Brain Blenders: I see ugly people…on my new HiDef TV!!

By: A.Ford

Did you know the problem with High Definition Television is that we will be able to see just how ugly people are in REAL LIFE! How much does that suck??!!!

“A.Ford, do you mean to sit there and tell me that our favorite actors are not all naturally beautiful people? And could in fact have an imperfection that spackling, and oil-based paint will not cover up????”
Dear reader, brace yourself for I must break it down to you… some of them are not perfect. I know, I know…give yourself a moment to catch your breath.

But seriously, have you seen this woman.

Granted, not at bad as this poor bastard.

The beauty of HDTV is that the picture is SO clear it brings out the most intimate details.

The clarity so rich you just don’t see the greenest grass you’ve ever pictured, but the dew that the morning left on the individual blades. I swear we are just a couple of years away from smelling through the TV. (can’t wait until that day comes and they do the post-game interview in the locker-room – ESPN will go off the air)

But back to the plight of the actors, some have blemishes, and scars and hairy lips that lighting and great filters can hide. Imperfections that television would not like us to see, and frankly I don’t want to see them either. I would much rather go on believing that the actors on TV are prettier than you and me, and that’s why they are making lots of money to memorize lines, worry about the next job they will/won’t get, the next job they’ll be fired from, fickle public opinion, attend award shows wearing ridiculous looking clothes, receive free crap from sponsors who want them to be seen with their products, sleep with Pamela Anderson and get a VD, get married to B. Spears for about an hour, and ….ah screw em…I hope they all look like over the road truckers after a 2 day roadie hauling pigs.