MR. Oi's Top 10 Video Games of all Time

By: Mr. Oi

1. Half Life (PC)
Installed first on my computer in November1998, installed on my Second Computer November of 2001, installed on my 3rd computer in October of 2003, do we see a pattern here? A game this good would have to mean creator Gabe Newell made pact with the devil. Once released Half Life went on to win over 50 “Game of The Year” rewards from numerous publications and spawned a variety of successful modifications like Counter Strike and Day of Defeat, add-ons, and mission packs. Today, Half-Life is still by far the most popular first person shooter online. No one was ready for the Half Life experience the first time they played it. The AI was smarter then anything previously released (on any platform). The story was better then any “B” movie and most “A” ones at that too. Once you load up HL and get through 8 min tram ride, you take on the role of Gordon Freeman, a nerdy scientist who gets caught smack dab in the middle of a secret government project gone bad, flooding the base with aliens. All in all Half Life gets the #1 spot because it changed PC gaming more than any of its peers ever did or could do.

2. TRIBES (PC)
The only game I have ever played for 18 months straight without taking more than a week off at a time. For those of us whom have surgically place a blue plasma disk in someone’s head understand the beauty of this masterpiece. . TRIBES single handily put online gaming on the map by showing us how good team play could be minus the standard death match. CTF base game TRIBES also added game types of Capture and Hold, rabbit, and Search and Destroy for a unique online game experience ahead of its time. With never-before-seen features like the "commander view," that offered full support for team multiplayer games and huge worlds that stretched out for miles TRIBES never made you feel claustrophobic. Tribes 2 was good, but it was plague with bugs at its initial release. TRIBES never had any major problems to speak of. Setting out what the developers envisioned it would do TRIBES revolutionized the world of multiplayer squad-level games by bringing us a truly DONKEY KICKEN LAIDEN experience.

3. Battlefield 1942 including both expansion packs (PC)
Just what does make this game better then most of the garbage being played on-line today? For starters it has plenty of vehicles (land, sea, and air), a ton of maps, diverse solider classes, excellent weapons, and 4 very distinctive Theatres of War. BF1942 has 5 countries split up into two different forces, the 'Allies' and the 'Axis'. Maps range from the scorching desserts of North Africa, to the villages of France, and the balmy islands of the south pacific. A great online experience with a low learning curve makes BF1942 a must have for anyone with a pc and high speed internet connection.

4. Return Fire (PC, 3DO)
I almost failed college because of this game. It caused more heated arguments, more thrown controllers, and more panic stricken moments then one could handle. The object was to capture your opponent’s flag. You can do this with tank, helicopter, missile launcher, or army jeep. Actually only the jeep could capture the flag the other vehicles just paved a path for it. In two player mode you and your friend try to take each others flag, and then smack talk all the way back to your base why your opponent desperately tries to stop you. This game built relationships; it made grown college boys cry, it is still in my opinion the best 2 player game ever conceived.

5. Star Control 2 (PC, 3DO)
Story is what set video games apart, and STAR CONTROL had a great beginning, middle, and end. Part adventure game part top down ¾ arcade space combat game, STAR CONTROL 2 blended a superb story line, decent graphics, and about 50 hours of game play into a single game. The arcade portion of the game puts you in one of many star ships including those from Star Control I, and lets you build a fleet and crush either another player or the computer in fast paced combat. The great news is you can get the arcade portion of this game for free at http://www.classicgaming.com/starcontrol/timewarp/ . Look for STAR CONTROL: Time Warp

6. C & C Red Alert (PC)
Westwood knows how to do real time strategy in fact they wrote the book on it. C&C: Red Alert is the prequel to Original Command and Conquer. You take control of either the Allies or the Soviets as you duke it out over balanced maps for control of the planet. The setup is: build base, build defenses, build buildings, build tanks, and build units, harvest resources. On line battles were crazy with each side mass producing units for that all out tank rush. Once battles started they did not stop, games could some time go for 3 hours or more. A great game that was far better then Red Alert 2, what a load garbage that was.

7. Dune 2 (PC, Atari Jaguar)
Ahhh.. DUNE 2 was my first real addiction to a real time strategy game. Considered the father of all RTS games, DUNE 2 is one of the most action-packed and addictive games of all time. Developed by Westwood it laid the ground work for all other RTS games to come.

8. Tecmo Bowl (NES)
“You can not throw to Jerry rice over the middle on 4th down man! That’s friggen bull crap, you cheating son of @$*#, good for nothing @#$$%!!!!!!” Ahhh that was the sound of my youth, the screams of my late teen potty mouth. For those who know what I am talking about, you could always count on the 49ers unstoppable pass play for a quick 1st down. There were only four plays to choose from on offense, two runs and two passes. The player takes control of the quarterback before the snap and then either hands the ball off to the running back or works through his receiver progression from the top to the bottom of the screen. Defense was a crap shoot all you did was try to guess which offensive play the opponent will select and then taking control of one of the defensive players before the snap. But it was the first football game to take America by storm. It would be another 3 years until the original Madden on SEGA GENESIS arrive so TECMO BOWL and TECMO BOWL 2 would have to do until then.

9. Super Mario World (SNES)
What can I say, more evil koopas, over 90 levels, and YOSHI made this game still the best of the Mario bunch.

10. GTA 3 (All Platforms)
Truly shocking! Excessive violence! Total freedom! These are the phrases that describe GTA. Take the first 2 top down GTA games and place them in a 3D environment with bad voice over acting and what you have is GTA 3. My advice to you is this: If you are single don’t play it with your mom in the room. Likewise if you are married don’t play it with your wife in your room.

Comments

[Mr.Oi]

Hey...... My students know they are not allowed to climb up on any class equipment anymore.... so there....
Mr. Pinis

[Richard Nibbler]

Real Jobs??? Man I wish I could sit in front of the computer while risking the lives of young people all day long.. while making a great salary.. instead of waiting once a year for a sales meeting.

Enough is Enough... you are the TECH God Mr. Oi!! I would have never crossed over to your world if it were not for the late night's in Florida!!

You still need to check out Wal-Mart's sale.

Dick

[Mr. Oi]

To Judy,
For someone who spent an appreciable amount of his time lambasting the Oi for supporting his opinion may need a real job......

[Richard Nibbler]

Great post Cone-head. God bless those English Majors.

[Mr. Oi]

To Mr. Richard (dick) Pequeno,
Call of Duty is a great game but it has not been out long enough yet. Since I failed to list my requirements for how games were voted on let me clear it up now.
1. For game to be considered it must be out for least one year. (Or in nibbler time: the average time you are lost when stepping out of the house "to be back in a second")
2. Games must have replay value. (like Judy, GOD Bless her, that Saint)
3. Games must be new, fresh, groundbreaking, or original. (Unlike your repetitive message about me not taking enough colon blow. Nice one Dickey your post was like an old Rodney Daingerfield joke that we all have all heard at least 20 times)
4. Graphics and sound quality are important but only count for a small part of the rating scale. (Your wife must use a similar grading scale when you were dating)

You are a slap my good average sized brain friend. My regularity, forceps at birth, or my FATKINS diet have no bearing on the size of head.
NEVER FORGET I am Grade Cabeza and you will allways be Pequeno Richard.

[Richard Nibbler]

Mr. OI:
At first I thought that picture of you represented how LARGE your brain was (ie: presenting you as a genius). However, after seeing your TOP TEN of all-time - I have come to the conclusion that your picture represents brain swelling that has yet to be explained on Brain Blenders! I cannot - let me repeat - CANNOT believe that CALL OF DUTY did not make this list. Call of Duty should have been in the TOP 3 or at least TOP 5!! So I asked myself, knowing your ability to master the video games....errrr Wife Escape, HOW DID MR. OI MISS THIS?

Then I looked at your picture one more time and using my background in psychology - I have come up with the following based on your inability to get this one right:

The 'big brain' is not a "BIG BRAIN" - rather it is swelling that may have been caused by one or more of the following:

1. TOOO Many "Too Much Weight Work-outs": many think that lifting too much weight at one time only brings a risk of "blowing the nut" and not in the good way! It can also lead to sudden pressure in the blood to a person's head/brain. Such pressure could provide us with the answer to our question: your head is soo large because you have been lifting too much weight at one-time.
CURE: Try lifting Diet Soda or Low-fat candy bars versus the SLURPIE or the SNICKER. The former contain less fat and sugar, thus allowing time for the swelling to subside.

2. Not enough fiber. Mr. Oi, have you been to the doc to have your oil checked? The ole' colon may be suffering! Your diet and lifting may have bound you up -- leading you push and 'give birth' to those solid pebbles every 3 days. Thus, the strain and pushing could have lead to pressure on the brain and the obvious swelling!! Keep in mind: If you find yourself imitating Samson by gripping each wall to relieve yourself only to get the sound of "drip,drip" when you have 3 days worth of Snickers, steak, and cereal in you..... eat more fiber!! You are going to blow your last vein!!

3. Finally, your mother - God Bless that saint -- may have said to the doctor -- CRAMP, CRAMP --- and he misunderstood her to say CLAMP, CLAMP --- causing them to pry your head out like a stubborn splinter... or to help you relate personally -- like what happens everytime you have to take a 'leak' -- which would explain the large NOGGIN'.

Whatever the case - it is obvious by your TOP TEN that your picture represents someone who does not have a LARGE head due to the cerebrial,cognitive content -- rather someone who needs to focus on a secret problem or pray they film a sequel to MASK. BUT DO NOT FRET MR. OI!! Keep in mind that the Elephant Man lives on as a hero of history... so there is HOPE. But just in case.... Wal-Mart a big sale for Metamucil!!

All my best to you:
Richard Nibbler (my friends call me Dick)

[Lost credit hours]

I cannot believe Capture the flag did not make. I do not know how many classes I missed to watch a little green tank traverse a warzone.