by: Brian J.
Shout the words “fantasy football draft” in a crowded room to your friend, who wonders why you have to leave early, and see what kind of reaction you get. First of all, let’s be honest, most of the people who heard you stopped registering everything you said after the word “fantasy”, like you’ve broken some code of civility for proper company. Your friend, depending on how close you are, is either laughing at you, or hiding his face with his palm like he wishes he was anywhere but there. Any women within earshot are probably checking their watches wondering if their cat needs bathed and what time your mommy has set curfew.
Honestly, that’s how it feels most of the time when you have to tell someone about your addiction to the game. After a while, those of us that are really invested, start going to message boards where the rest of our kind gather to talk the talk. I’m told by a friend that some 50 million people play fantasy football. 50 million! If we united, the world would be ours! Well…we’d be cooler than the star-trek geeks anyway. But I get ahead of myself. You are probably one of the people who was around when I shouted, and even after someone who heard what I said clarified for you, there was still a small sense of unease within your gut about what any guy would be doing playing a game with the word “fantasy” involved. To which I say, “whatever dude.”
So anyway, here’s the deal with the game: there are 3 things you need to know.
1. There is a draft.
2. There is a basic format, which is customizable based on personal preference.
3. The actual performance of NFL players determines the outcome.
Let’s unpack. The draft goes down like this: every offensive player in the NFL is up for grabs. Teams take turns selecting players. There is no loyalty to team or city or state (well, in a perfect world there wouldn’t be, but most people can’t help choosing guys they like and root for). Everyone is available. You want to take a 3rd string QB for the Cardinals, take him (you’d be an idiot to do so). You want Randy Moss, grab him early, ‘cause he won’t be around long; the good players never are.
The draft generally snakes, meaning the team with the first pick doesn’t select again until the 20th pick, while the team that goes 10th (assuming there are 10 teams in the league) also selects 11th, but then waits till 30 to choose another player. This method is thought to more fairly distribute talent. This format is followed for a preset number of rounds—usually somewhere between 14 and 20—within which teams must fill their starting lineups.
This leads us to the second thing you should know. Most leagues have between 8 and 14 teams. Each team is run by a different owner (that’s the geek behind the keyboard). Leagues have a variety of starting lineup requirements, though a basic one would look like this: 1 QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, 1 TE, 1 K, 1 DEF. That is, on any given week, of the available players a team has on its roster, the owner would choose 1 quarterback, 2 running backs, 2 wide receivers, 1 tight end, 1 kicker, and 1 team defense to “start” for them. So, if you’ve got 4 RBs on your team, you’ve got to choose (based on any number of objective and subjective factors) which 2 you will “start” on any given week, and only the performances of these 2 will count toward your total for the week.
Follow me on this one, here’s number 3, which is for many the most difficult part to understand. Your starters are matched up against the starters from another team in your league. Both of you have chosen from your available players which ones will start (and therefore count towards your total for the week) and now you sit back and watch real NFL action unfold. The actual performances of your starters translate into fantasy points based on your league’s scoring system. League scoring systems, like most fantasy football components, are highly customizable, but a “basic” package exists. Quarterbacks get 1 fantasy point for every 40 yards passing they have. RBs and WRs get 1 point for every 10 yards rushing or receiving. Rushing and receiving touchdowns are awarded (you guessed it!) 6 points. Fumbles and interceptions result in negative points. Kickers get points making extra points and field goals. Defenses for sacks and interceptions and fumble recoveries, etc. You get the idea by now, right? The stuff that happens on the field becomes points in a fantasy world where every yard and touchdown and fumble and reception and interception net out to result in an aggregate score for a team. If the total points generated by your starters is greater than the total points generated by your opponent’s starters, you win the fantasy football game.
Fantasy is as simple as that.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to awkwardly slink out of the room and pretend no one thinks I’m a pervert.
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